Well...it's been brought to my attention that I have not posted in almost a month...and certain people are tired of seeing Life's been Fu-Crazy....but honestly it has! I am going through some changes right now....and trying to figure out just how much I want to share on my blog is really challenging my ability to write about anything else. So in order to cure my writers block....I've got to share the good the bad and the ugly!
I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror a few months ago(I try to avoid mirrors, except for the small one I use to apply my makeup) and I didn't recognize the girl that was looking back at me....I cover my insecurity with my humor; poking fun at myself first...before someone else does. I have always been Snarky and Funny but I have become the Snarky, Funny Fat Girl. I love being Snarky....I love being funny....I love making people laugh, even if they are laughing at me....I just don't want to be fat anymore. Like my friend J and I say all the time...we would rather be
Hot & Hungry than Fat & Forty.
J got a jump start on me and she has inspired me.... to find the Hot & Hungry girl inside of me.....I love her! She is FU-MAZING!
I explained to Fish Bait today that something clicked a few months ago...before I made the CHANGES; I started looking at food different....sought the help of a nutritionist and started reading everything I could about the effects of food on my body. One of the things I discovered is; I was like a meth head...but my drug of choice is food.....thankfully it didn't make my teeth fall out or give me those really fucked up sores all over my face...or make me go sell my body for my next fix. Food is my crack, it is my addiction, my crutch, my fix....Except it isn't fixing anything...it's just made things worse and I lost myself....
So I have made major changes....and so far I have lost 47lbs and 4 dress sizes....I am no longer having to buy clothing with a "W" behind it(Which I believe secretly stands for WIDE not Women)!!!!! My feet aren't hurting, I am sleeping, I have energy and I am starting to like the girl I see in the mirror. Last night it was Queen's Birthday and we went to her Castle to celebrate with her. As I looked around the table at the beautiful women I have in my life....I almost cried......For some reason God has blessed me....and I give thanks to him... I did ask him on my way home from Queen's house what have I done to deserve these women? I personally don't know what they see in me, why they are my friends, why they love me....I know why I love each one of them...they are loyal, loving, kind, generous, supportive and Fu-Funny!
My bible is "This is why your Fat" by Jackie Warner. She is one BAD ASS LESBIAN....and I love her guts!!!!! I will go into more details about Jackie's book later...